You exist in my head. In a little part of my brain, in a corner of my thoughts, my mind.
That part is dark, it is sad and it is tumultuous. That little part is never at peace. It is restless.
When I need you, I reach in to the little part to find you, and I become visibly distressed.
You represent all that could have been, but will never be.
I know I put you in there my self, locked away in bits and pieces of memory, formed and hidden over time. Some pleasant, others not. I intended for the space to be a pleasant one, my personal Shangri-la, where I could retreat and call up a smile. But somehow, it has evolved into a chaotic, disorderly place containing the saddest memories and most unpleasant experiences. Even the pleasant memories have since taken on an unpleasant hue.
I have come to accept it as such a place as it is. An unhappy place, to be visited often, for it is my own creation, and I must live with it.
Perhaps, someday, by some unexpected, unforeseen miracle, the little part will become organized, so that I can smile when I reach in there, but for now, the chaos and emotional torment is all I’ve got.
You exist in a place within my mind.
It is an unpleasant place…
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10 comments:
:(
Not a very pleasant place, why bring it up often?
Its a cute piece.
I hope the "little part of your brain" gets plesant some day. :)
@ Fabulo-la: You get the point.
@Myne Whitman: I wonder too...
@kay9: Thank you. I doubt it though.
really nice write-up, notwithstanding.
this is sad....:(
Why visit, if it makes you this sad. Hope it gets better
I think we all have those little places...tucked in here and there in our brains...a wonder the brain not filled up yet, since we always find new storage holes...
I FIND THIS VERY POWERFUL!!!
sad... but perhaps its best to lock it away for good?
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